Parenting Series 02 - Discipline

Ohla Bee,

So, Discipline.

Too little or too much?

Will cautioning my child make him/her hate me?

Am I being too strong/harsh by disciplining my child? This seems to come up every time with different individuals. Ranging from parents, aunts, to female in general, one thing is certain… it hurts to hear anyone call a child, ‘BADLY BEHAVED.’  In fact just the other day, my fairy godmother paid me a visit at work and while we were catching up on everything under the sun, we talked about the disconnect that sometimes exists with a child’s physical features and their behavior e.g. when you see a cute child only to have the wee bairn flip and start throwing tantrums.

It made me remember working at the airport and the loops children put their parents through while waiting for their flight.

Before you start that train of thought, let us first agree that waiting in a departure waiting lounge in any time zone can try the patience of a monk., ya? With that out of the way, shout-outs to children who still spend that much time waiting for their flight with their parents but still maintain their coll. Y’all are the real MVP!

From screaming, yelling and scattering, I’d like to believe I’ve seen my fair share of tantrum throwing kids.

Which brings me to the question… what is too little/ too much discipline? When’s the best time to start??

It took me awhile to actually realize that you start from Day 1.

I used to say to myself, ‘I’ll wait to start when she can crawl or sit up straight.’ Only to realize that this little being needs guidance EVERYDAY. So from, ‘don’t put that in your mouth’ to ‘sit down here’ all those tiny instructions form the very essence of ‘hearing word’

All them baby books instruct that parents speak to their children. So I think that’s a great way to start.

Let your child know their actions have consequences (Makes me remember the ‘Life is Strange’ game.). Speak to them like rational humans because like my fairy godmother would say, these children are probably even smarter than adults are!

Here are a few quick wins I try to follow (I’m such a sucker for tears… I’m still learning how to firm up and Keletwi’s helping teach me how to sidestep the waterworks):

1.        * 1. Speak to your wee bairn with love and respect. Don’t start bullying or being a push over with ya size!

2.       * 2.  Correct firmly and with love. Watch the pitch of your voice. Never has it been heard that anything was resolved by yelling ( just coined that. Hehehehehehehe).

3.        *3. Keep them gainfully occupied… Think they’ll be a distraction while you’re cooking? Have a make-shift corner for them in the kitchen and have them tinker around away from danger, of course. SAFETY FIRST ( Do what works for you).

4.       *4. Speak audibly. Again, watch the pitch of your voice. Kids are very good at reading body language, trust me.

5.       *5.  Correct, correct, correct. That’s your KPI as a parent. You’re there to serve as a guide and to help them in everyyyyyyyyy way!

And *6. pray plenty!!!!!!!!

You truly cannot do it without GOD.

Loads of hugs!

Cee.